First meetings

I am always surprised at how conflicted the emotions of the women I date are when first we meet. I am completely honest and hold nothing back, tho I never let on as to how I feel about them. I am philosophical, humorous and serving them with no agenda but to be known and to get to know them (with the obvious intention to find common attraction and understanding as to a future in marriage etc.) I can give many compliments when I am sure of how I feel towards them wether as a friend or as more but they seem to struggle with complete honesty. Not everyone who likes me is liked by me and vice versa so one would think honesty as the only way to build into a relationship or let the other person move on and find what will work for them. Besides which the 5 stages are 1 meeting 2 dating 3 courting 4 engagement 5 marriage so chill out have fun and we will see where this can go!

Truth

Truth is!
I know!
Consistant and no respecter of persons!
All are subject to change, change is Eternal!
Change is a perspective!
Fullfilment means all things become new!
Be and you will be!
Let go and you are free!
Lose yourself and be found!
Give and you will recieve an hundred fold, yea more!
Words have meaning!
There is power in the word!
Faith is knowing the truth before the means!
Love is everything, everything is love!

Danger

There is a danger in being Matt
Place Mat
Floor Mat
Matte White
Door Mat

But I am Matty
Am I your Matty?
So Whosyomatty?
What does it mean to Have Matty?
And what does it mean to be Matty?


Jesus First
Others Next
Yourself Last

It is to be Loyal
To Give Service
To be Honest
Full of Integrity
Consistent Yet Full of Surprises
It is Me Being Me

Loving You Being You!

Truly

I have been contemplating many things this past few months, not the lest of which my personal worth!

It seems as though one all too often places this value judgement into the hands of others who really have no true basis for the evaluation. If one were to compare two works of pottery that I had thrown on a wheel, that I had created form a raw lump of clay, no matter how hard I may try to make them look and feel the exact same, they would be completely different and unique. The value and worth of the individual, the intrinsic uniqueness of every single living creature upon the earth are just as clear when speaking with twins.


We have no way of becoming someone else, we must find a psychological perspective which allows us to be ok with both the similarities and the differences with which we all are naturally subject. The greatest test of this life is to be our best selves, there are many and varied opinions on just what that would be. I want to be me and I want to please the society around me but I do not wish to please either one at the expense of the other. Here is where Shakespeare was genius, "to thine own self be true" this does not mean selfish or myopic, rather it is to say be a person of integrity. Self betrayal and the betrayal of others is the root of all unhappiness. By choosing consistent behavior, combined with true and correct principals for living, we achieve a Utopian state.

"Bearing the burden of the unique" as my friend Mitch puts it. Not worrying about the fact that we are not assembly line cookie cutter cutouts, exactly the same as everyone else. Being human is having faults, it is a struggle and it is going through pain. Life is also beautiful, vibrant and incredible. The paradigm with which we choose to live, will determine both our attitude and our experience. No one is born perfect with a knowledge and understanding of all things. We must all learn bit by bit, building our understanding one principal and one experience at a time.
What source can we trust? What rubric do we approach the future with? With what do we measure ourselves against? and Why?

Loves Worth

A picture of perfection we dream in the night
reveling in the hope of all things aright
unprepared for such great loss such pain
deeply cutting asunder then bleeding me to stain

A beauty so rare and so innocent
one cannot of love so represent
without the intrinsic beat of the heart
that tells you truly, love is an art

I will not give into this sorrow of loneliness
or be stuck in this moment without redress
I will be true to my inmost secret desires
negative thoughts or depressions mires are
burning to ashes as on funeral priers


I am unique without and within
I am a man who will never give in
Change is inherent change is the key
I imagine perfection as you sealed to me

Pleading

Though the days of my life turn dark as deep night
when I'm feeling alone and desperate for light
with no hope of a saviour, of a friend or a sign
Jesus my brother please tell me I'm thine
say; "Be not afraid of the unknown ahead
hold fast to my love and my peace in its stead
for I bought you with blood, under anguish and pain
I give you my love which will ever remain
now let go of your sins of your anger and pride
and come to me clean as the virginal bride
to dwell here in heaven forever with me
your sins I've forgiven for you came unto me."

Tho the days of our lives turn dark as deep night
tho I'm feeling alone and desperate for light
no hope of a saviour, of friend or a sign